man i feel bad about it tho

because i think my parents do a lot for me?? i mean they buy food and paper and don’t hit me well at least they don’t TRY to do it very hard it just happens that way but it’s not malicious?? i have ridiculously sensitive skin and if i so much as poke myself harder than just-barely then it stings for up to ten minutes afterwards and i’m going off on a tangent as usual aren’t i

but anyway

my parents are great. they make fun of me a lot but they don’t know that it’s not nice so it’s not their fault, and they don’t believe me about things but that’s because i’m a kid and it’s pretty much to be expected

and i still cringe really hard inside when people ask for things from their parents that they don’t need?? i just

can’t imagine doing that, it’s just always been that if it isn’t necessary then we can earn the money for it ourselves and honestly i like it a lot better that way because there’s nothing i hate doing more than asking people for things

and when people do it just grinds my gears the wrong way for some reason, when they are perfectly capable of getting it themselves especially! and definitely 100% when they get mad about not getting it. it brings out this really horrible callous part of me that wants to simultaneously kick that person in the teeth and tell them to grow up while also collapsing in a heap of secondhand embarrassment because oh my god why are you doing that STOP

THEY DON’T OWE YOU ANYTHING?? ACTUALLY IT’S PROBABLY THE OTHER WAY AROUND

SO QUIT ACTING UNGRATEFUL AND GO WASH DISHES OR SOMETHING INSTEAD OF JUST DEMANDING STUFF… PLEASE??? THANK

SOAP LID RETRIEVED

PICKED UP ~476 TINY PLASTIC BEADS OFF CATFURCARPET

BOWL OF BEADS ALMOST FULL, ONLY LIKE 60 LEFT

KNOCKED OVER BOWL

BEADS EVERYWHERE

… THIS IS STUPID

MOTHERFUCK

I FORGOT THE SOAP LID WASN’T ATTATCHED AND ACCIDENTALLY THREW IT BEHIND THE DRYER

AND THEN PILED UP ABUNCH OF STUFF IN THE SINK INSTEAD OF THE WASHER AND I KEEP TGINKING I SEE MY DAD WATCHING ME OR IDK SOMEONE SCARY BUT THERE’S NOT PEOPLE IT’S JUST SHADOWS

I AM JUST. NOT CUT OUT FOR LIVING AM I WOW

“oh ya i just wanted to tell u that i respect ur fears”

shut the FUCK up dude “i respect ur fears” yea iM GONNA CALL BULLSHIT ON THIS ONE DADDY-O SEEIN AS YOU INSIST I INSTANTLY GET OVER THEM AND DEAL WITH IT WHILE PUSHING ME INTO THE EXACT FEARS YOU KEEP SAYING YOU RESPECT WHILE I AM OBVIOUSLY HIGHLY UNCOMFORTABLE

GET OVER IT YEAH WHAT DO YOU THINK IM TRYING TO DO OMG ITS NOT THAT SIMPLE SORRY GO AWAY AND LET ME WORK STOP TALKING TO ME I NEED TO FOCUS ON NOT PANICKING THANK!!! YELLS AT NO ONE WHILE ANGRILY WASHING CLOTHES AND PUTTING SISTERS THINGS AWAY

i was having a panic attack and my dad said to get over it and i kNOW TAGT WGAT DP YOU THINHLK IMB TRYING TO DO

AND IT DUDGT WOEK AND J RAN UNSIDE AND i ms o scared iof bNotuinG

thuis iscstupid

thanks autocorrect you’re a lifesaver tanks for the fixing words( mostly

I m ok now but I hate spabicking like that causei st art hypervenijgykdating and crying and itrs disgustingx

im gonba go sweep and ghope he doesn’t yetlll at md for being stupid and bAd im sor r y

i want to find the highest-quality picture of a cheeseburger as possible

i want to examine every glob of fat and oil

then i want to reflect on the prevention of breast cancer one more time, and THEN WRITE A STORY ABOUT BOYS WITH VERY LONG HAIR

i dONT REALLY WANT TO TALK TO MY FRIENDS RIGHT NOW SO IM JUST POSTING DUMB STUFF ABOUT MY DAD AND VAGINAS WHERE NOBODY EXCEPT U CAN SEE IT SORRY

SAME DIFF, DAD AND VAGINAS, THEY’RE BOTH VERY TOUCHY AND I DON’T WANT TO LICK THEM BUT ANYHOW

sighs i love my buddies to pieces and i would live with them if i could but i seem to be getting into the habit of being a weenie about talking to people oops

iM JUST. MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE I’VE BEEN SAYING STUPID THINGS ALL DAY AND BOTHERING DAD AGAIN BUT I M SCARED TO TALK TO PEOPLE

I DON’T WANT TO BE ANNOYING I JUST. WANT TO NOT BE??????? HEL P

man why would you want to lick someone’s vagina

im just thinking about how unsanitary that is and i bet it doesn’t even taste good

i mean maybe to some people it feels nice enough to be worth it but?? how

ok so i’m not exactly the world’s biggest sexual deviant here I’M 15 but ive ~tmi~ uhhh tested the waters and?? no thank

it’s not even gratifying it’s just uncomfortable as heck and kind of pointless

i ain’t stickin my mouth down there anyway thank and i hope that, for the health of others, nobody else does either

aaaack

WAIT WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT THIS

i was trying to talk to my dad because hey he’s trying to be friendly today and i feel bad for not saying anything..?? even if he’s the reason i don’t want to?? and so i was talking

but omg i was so annoying i just know it

somehow the subject got on our ex-neighbor (the creepy one who kept hitting on my mom) and then i told him about TPDs because i think mike has one..!!! he used to be on medication and just stayed inside his house, it was only once he was off it that he started following us around, but the way he talked… he’d jump from one subject to the next in mid-sentence, when we were over at his house, like he was talking about the cats on his porch and then he said that me and my mom had the same size feet. and things like that, all really disconnected, and he didn’t even seem aware that he was doing it?? anyway

somehow that turned into me telling him about that really scary “entropy” test?? with the colors and the awful noises and ugh ugh UGH

and i told him about that and how it was really scary and he said i was stupid and shouldn’t trust things on the Internet

I DIDN’T SAY IT HAD ACCURATE RESULTS… I JUST SAID IT WAS REALLY UNSETTLING… he told me to get over it and stop complaining

he said the same thing to the other stuff i said, that it was dumb, and like

i know it’s my fault for letting myself talk to him again but now i just feel really guilty about it too?? because i didn’t say anything smart or useful, AGAIN, and why do i even bother iM REALLY REALLY ANNOYING…

SIGHS

ALSO I HAVE A VERITABLE LANDSLIDE FUCKTON OF HOMEWORK BUT I DONTCARE WHY DID I THINK I COULD HANDLE HONORS CLASSES

LAME!!!!!!!!!

every night for the past few months i get rly gross migraines and im cry

just let me write words god dang it STOPPPP